This isn't agile.

Firstly, Scrum is not agile. Scrum, frankly, is bullshit. I was raised in an Extreme Programming house (literally - i have had Kent Beck sit on my dad's sofa and talk to me about testing), and i can tell you straight up that Scrum is not it. Scrum is a project management tool - a defined rhythm for a development project. But it has nothing to say about the development itself, and very little to say about requirements, planning, and the relationship with the customer. XP has a lot to say about all that; any other methodology which wants to call itself agile has to have something to add to the conversation. Scrum proponents have described it not as a process, but as a wrapper for a process. A wise man once pointed out that a wrapper is the thing you remove and discard to get to the good stuff.

Okay, scrum rant over!

Secondly, a founding principle of XP, which i believe is fundamental to any agile process, is that it is centred on the developer. It's a way of giving developers the power to do the job they know they need to do, and are so frequently stopped from doing. An agile team may be structured as a democracy or an autocracy, but the leaders are developers. There are roles for project managers and so on - vital roles - but it's not one of team leadership. Having a manager - sorry, 'scrum master' - sitting there bossing people around is a sure sign that the team is not doing agile.

I feel like there should be a thirdly. There isn't.