Programming isn't alien to me. I first starting doing markup (HTML, now please don't laugh at me) when I was 12 and a little bit of BASIC when I was 13 (I knew much about Flowcharts, Pseudocodes at this point), but then I was admonished into Biology in high school and hence missed out on "real" programming knowledge of languages such as C, Java, etcetera. I took up CS for my UG B.E. (similar to BS, but way more theoretical). I learnt C & C++ (to a lesser extent) on my own (my prof was a total pain and the class was filled with code-jocks (who had already learnt it in school, and hence paid no attention to class and didn't let lesser mortals like me to pay any attention to class either)) and could whip up an awesome addition or multiplication program (ones which now even kinder-gardeners' whip up with way more finesse) and a piss-poor knowledge of Java (which has even grown rusty in recent times).

My main problem is that I've always felt inadequate and strangled by my limited programming skills and belittled by the code-jocks (believe me, I've come across this site ages ago, but could just now build up the courage to actually post a question) and have been at times even depressed over said inability. Most people say that Programming isn't necessarily about the language but the state of mind that the person has and the techniques they employ to solve problems/issues. I agree with such sentiments, but can I ever acquire such a "state of mind", and if such how should I approach "Programming/Coding", and if there are any set ways and steps one most go through to attain the "Zen of Coding". How do I do so? Also, it wouldn't hurt if some Saint wanted to mentor this downtrodden piece of $#!^. 

P.S. I would forever be grateful to any person who considers me worth their time, and as a bonus would name my first piece of Software I ship after them. (If I ever get to ship one, i.e.,)

TL;DR: Never really learnt "Programming/Coding", can't solve problems even if I try to. Help me!